Back to School: Parents Beware!

Christians often ask the wrong questions.

Instead of asking, “Why doesn’t God save everyone?” we should ask, “Why does God save anyone?”

Another example, sometimes a Christian parent will ask me my opinion on home schooling or private school or public school.  I have made my thoughts on those subjects crystal clear for many years, from the pulpit, in the counseling rooms, and on this blog!  But I suggest to such a parent that he or she is really asking the wrong question.

Rather than try and pro/con the whole educational options debate, which treats the hearts and souls of our children somewhat like they matter no more to us than if we were buying a new car, we should learn to ask good questions.  Biblical questions.

The two big questions every Christian parent should ask in this matter are:

  1. If all I had was my Bible, how would I raise / educate / train my child? 
  2. Who do I want to raise my child? 

These two questions strike at the real jugular of the issue.  In the biblical worldview, to educate a child is to raise a child is to teach a child is to train a child is to discipline a child.  These heart-and-mind-shaping activities simply cannot be compartmentalized in God’s way of thinking.  What we now have been programmed to call “education” is what the Lord Almighty calls “Disciple Making.”

“A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone when he is fully trained will be like his teacher” (Luke 6:40).

“Father [parents] do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Eph 6:4).

“You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down and when you rise up” (Deut 6:7).

“My son, do not forget my teaching, but let your heart keep my commandments . . . my son be attentive to my wisdom; incline your ear to my understanding” (Prov 3:1; 5:1).

One cannot help but grasp the comprehensive nature of child-rearing when one seeks to get God’s view of it.  While I have a soft heart for those in the church who simply cannot home school, such as single moms, and I do not in any way mean to disparage Christian teachers seeking to invest in kids in public schools, as a Pastor committed to the absolute sufficiency of Scripture I must warn every parent to ask these probing questions.  If you are only spending a few hours a day, 5 days a week, with your child, then who is really raising your child?  And if all you had were your Bible, how would you parent?

“All Scripture is breathed out by God and is profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness that the man of God may be thoroughly [sufficiently] equipped for every good work” (2 Tim 3:16-17).

It is hard to imagine a better “good work” than raising, teaching, training, discipling our children.

But for those of you who simply cannot resist the pro/con method, consider the results of the Gen2 survey sponsored by Generations Ministry.  The survey was conducted 2013-2015 of 10,000 Millenials who grew up in Christian homes during the 1990s and early 2000s.  Here are a few results:

  • A private Christian school student is 270% more likely to believe in evolution, and the public school student is 330% more likely to believe in evolution, than a home school student.
  • A public school student is 330% more likely to be sexually abused (self-reported) than a home school student.
  • The active role of the father in a child’s sexual purity is pivotal.
  • Children who abandoned the faith later in life cited their parents’ hypocrisy most often as the prime factor.  In other words, if we parents say the Bible is enough, then we had better seek grace to live that out in every decision, and to spend many hours with our children so they can see what it means to “walk in a manner worthy of your calling” (Eph 4:1).  Our children are watching!

Of course, there are no perfect homes.  We are all broken in some ways.  And there are exceptions to every generality.  But I am persuaded the most important questions to ask in these matters are the two I gave above.  If you need to sink your teeth more deeply into this topic, dear Dad and Mom, go get a copy of Disciple Like Jesus for Parents by Alan Melton and Paul Dean.  Really.  Read it.  And may God’s Spirit grant us all courage to be disciples who make disciples . . . beginning at home.

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Public Schools = Pastor’s Nuisance

State run public education has been on my “do not approve” list for the last 15 years or so.  While I love the public school teachers in our evangelical churches, and pray for them as they are hand-cuffed by godless curricula and administrations, I stand by my general disapproval of the system itself.

The problems in the K-12 (not to mention the university system) system are really too numerous to even tackle now for Bible-believing pastors.  Planned Parenthood runs the “sex education.”  GLSEN gets a nod to infiltrate every level of the system, meaning our 1st graders are being routinely exposed to the agenda of those who promote sexual sins and self-rule as normal and acceptable.  Public libraries across the country now sponsor “Drag Queen Story Hour.”  High school boys, in some schools, can now shower with girls.  And girls can play on boys sports teams.  And boys who consider themselves girls can compete against actual girls.  And science texts lie and present as facts preposterous theories that have not given any good, hard evidence in 150 years (i.e., Darwinian Evolution).  The system truly appears un-redeemable, in my opinion.  For many parents like me, the only viable solution is to home-school or if you can afford it, to use private Christian schools.

Add to the madness now that a Social Studies textbook being used in Sullivan County Tennessee claims Allah is the same God as the Christian God.  For more information, see:

Controversy Erupts in Tennessee Over Textbook That Claims Allah is the Same as the God of the Bible

Typically, if one public school is using a textbook, many hundreds more are too.  This is why I tell Christian parents whose children are in public schools that they really should take the time to read each textbook their child is assigned.  There is no other way to help the child learn to counter the lies.  While the Sullivan County school is defending the textbook by saying they are not allowed to promote one religion over another, that really skirts the whole matter, doesn’t it?

A proper education deals in facts.  And no self-respecting Muslim would agree that Allah is the same God as the God of Christianity.  And no Bible-believing Christian would assent to that claim either.  Why not just teach the facts of each religion?  Students with any modicum of reasoning ability will then discern that all religious claims simply cannot be true.  Relativism does not work.  Islam cannot be true if the Bible is accurate and true.  I wonder if the social studies text also says the millions of Hindu gods are also the same as Allah or the Christian God?

You see, relativism never works.  Ever.  It’s central claim, that there is no such thing as absolute truth, is self-referentially absurd.  To debunk it, one only needs ask, “Is it absolutely true, then, that there is no such thing as absolute truth?”

I hope some Christians show up to Sullivan County Board of Education meetings and ask:

  • Is Allah the God who chose Isaac, not Ishmael?
  • Is Allah the Father of the Lord Jesus Christ?
  • Is Allah the God who saves sinners by pouring out His wrath on His Son on the cross, granting Jesus’ righteousness to all who cry out to Him for mercy as Lord, King, and Savior?
  • Is Allah the God who has committed all judgment to His Son, Jesus?
  • Is Allah the God whose glory may only be seen and enjoyed in the face of Jesus Christ?

These questions ought to be sufficient to convince them to throw that textbook in the trash where it belongs.  I pray the Christians in Sullivan County will be found faithful, loving, kind and true to the gospel.  Only that kind of witness has God’s stamp of approval.  And who knows?  Such a witness may just be the means God uses to save a Muslim, or a confused student, or an irate parent.  To the glory of Christ alone!

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The Dignity of Home-Making

My wife and I have two amazing daughters.  Raising them has been a deeper joy and a more difficult challenge than we ever anticipated.  It has kept us humble and prayerful, seeking God’s grace in Christ.

Our oldest daughter (19) has expressed little to no interest in college or even a “career.”  We have raised both of our daughters to follow God’s dream for their lives.  If that includes education or training beyond high school, praise God!  If it does not, praise God!  Their identity is forever anchored in the electing, calling, saving, sanctifying and glorifying grace of God through Jesus Christ our Lord as applied to their hearts by the Holy Spirit.  Our oldest daughter wants to be a Christ-centered wife and mother.  One would think such a desire would receive the respect it deserves in the church.  But sadly so many believers in America have been feminized that she has had to endure a fair bit of gentle criticism.  But, by God’s grace, she has stood firm.  She works a steady job, and is patiently waiting for a young man down in North Carolina to keep doing what is necessary to become her husband.  We are so proud of her in a good parental sort of way.

As we approach Mother’s Day, I thought this Q&A by R.C. Sproul was fitting.  May it bless all of you sisters in Christ who find great joy and dignity in being a wife and mother.  Keep living for an audience of One. 

And men, please pay close attention to how monumental your role is in all of this, according to the counsel of the late, great pastor-scholar, Dr. Sproul.

How does a woman find dignity as a housewife and mother in today’s career-minded society?

The quest for dignity is not limited to women nor to women in careers or in the home, but it’s a universal quest. I’ve been involved in many, many seminars that focus on the quest of human dignity, and I have found that every person I have ever talked to wants to be treated with dignity and wants to be sure they have dignity. At the same time, I have discovered that giving a clear definition to the concept of dignity is a very difficult task, yet everybody knows when they have lost dignity.

The woman whose vocation is being a homemaker and a mother, and that is her career rather than working in the business community, is feeling sort of a reverse pressure that other women felt a few years ago when they went into the business world and were discriminated against for somehow abandoning their place in the home. Women today are feeling an imposed guilt for not having a career; somehow being a homemaker is considered a less–than–dignified vocation.

Obviously God clearly affirms the dignity of that role for a woman. The children will rise up and call her blessed. But when God’s Word affirms the dignity or value of something, that is not always enough for us to keep our own security about it. It should be enough—if God says it, that should settle it. But it doesn’t settle it with us. We’re feeble, fragile in our feelings, and we can be made insecure by the culture that looks down upon this particular role.

I would say that the single most important individual in maintaining the dignity of a woman in the home is the husband in the home. If the husband demeans or ignores or puts down or treats as insignificant the labor of his wife, he becomes the principal destroyer of this woman’s dignity. And so the first thing that has to be done to restore the dignity of the woman in the home is having the husband and children create an environment of appreciation and verbalize that appreciation.

Somebody once made the statement that the negative input of one criticism requires nine compliments to be overcome in our personalities. That’s certainly true. One criticism of a wife in the home can devastate her self-esteem in that role, particularly when the rest of the culture is trying to tell her that homemaking and mothering are no longer significant enterprises.


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Responding to Revoice

Last year a conference was held in St. Louis called “Revoice.”  Although I have not listened to any of the sermons or speeches given at the conference, I studied up on it enough to know it was not a conference I would personally endorse or attend.  Several speakers at this conference are advocating for the acceptance of labels such as “Gay Christian.”  Sexual desires and behaviors that God condemns in His Word are also being endorsed and called “not evil.”  Christians who truly embrace the Inerrancy of the Bible simply cannot give approval to Revoice.

Here is one of the most helpful and thoughtful responses I have seen so far, given by the President of Covenant Theological Seminary:

A Strong Statement on Sexuality from the President of Covenant Theological Seminary

His response is good for our souls, dear church, if we will but hear his message humbly.  His response is not just a good and sound rebuttal of Revoice, it is a good word for how we should all seek to do relationships in our local churches.

“Do not speak evil against one another, brothers.  Anyone who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law” (James 4:11).

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The Pro-Abortion Consistency

Earlier this week, the US Senate was unable to pass straight-forward legislation that would have ensured any babies born alive during abortion attempts receive standard medical care.  Every Democrat except three voted “no.”

So, let’s be very clear.  These Senators, elected to one of the highest and most noble offices in our great Nation, voted to allow a doctor, and nurses, to simply leave a bloody, crying, wriggling baby on the operating table to die.  No first aid.  No nothing.  Or, one would assume, these senators think it would actually be best and most proper for the aborting doctor to just go ahead and finish the job.  Stab that baby in the heart.  Decapitate the baby.  Whatever it takes.  Just stop the incessant crying.  End that baby’s life, whatever it takes!

One wonders how it is possible for any human being to support such policy and procedure.  Much less some of the most educated and intelligent leaders in our country?!  I firmly believe in the Bible Doctrine of Total Depravity.  That is, every human is fallen and sinful and unable to be reconciled to our Creator God by our own efforts.  And sin has infected every single part of us as humans, thus the word “total” (if you need a refresher course here, read Romans 1-3).  But Total Depravity does not mean that every human is as sinful as he or she can possibly be.  Aren’t we thankful for this common grace truth?  Imagine a world where everyone is as given over to evil as he or she possibly could be.  Literally hell on earth.  Scary, huh?

Well folks, that world is seemingly becoming a reality in the United States Congress!

But I must confess, at least the Democrats and pro-abortion proponents are consistent.  Once you support the killing of babies, does it really matter where the baby is located?  And if it does matter, why?  Why would it be OK to carve up an infant inside the womb, but not be OK to do so outside the womb?  If the baby’s not wanted by the mother, then the mother’s desire always matters most.  Right?  And carrying this to its logical conclusion, then why would a mother not then be able to shoot her five-year old dead too?  So long as she decides the child is not wanted, or the child is inconveniencing her, or threatening her “health,” then why would the age of a child matter?  I mean, do we seriously think murder is right and good only if a doctor does it during a so-called “medical procedure” inside a woman’s womb?  Why not just let moms kill their children whenever they want?  That’s true “Abortion-On-Demand.”

In a weird, stomach-churning kind of way, I am thankful for this moment of clarity in our Nation.  May God be pleased to awaken hundreds of thousands of Americans to the stark reality that abortion is murder.  It destroys a human being.  Period.  And once someone is OK with murder, then where does it stop?  Why bother trying to put any parameters on it at all?

And I wonder where the outrage of Republicans and thousands of Christians has been for the last two years as we have watched a once Republican-controlled Congress refuse to de-fund Planned Parenthood?  Why are we so outraged now that Democrats and pro-choicers have proven they are actually more consistent then we are?  At what point will we fully and finally . . .

Be wretched and mourn and weep.  Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom.  Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will exalt you” (James 4:9-10).


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